The Importance of Friendship

Friendship has always been important to me, ever since I was a little girl. I have always had to have someone close to me. All my life, I have never been the type that had a lot of friends. Just a couple of close friends was good enough for me. I only had 1 or 2 close friends. I had lots of other "friends". The types that you hang out with in groups and such, but they were not close.

I guess I am the same way today. I have a few close friends. I have alot of other friends through church and such, friends that I know would help me out if I needed it.

My best friend (well, besides my husband. But, that is a type of friendship on its own. WAY different), is Robyn. We have been friends since we were in 8th grade. We have had our ups and downs. We have had periods in time that we did not speak to each other, but we've always gotten through them and have remained close. Robyn and I are not the the type of friends that speak on the phone everyday, or hours at a time, but our friendship is solid. We chat often online when we can. The problem is: she is about 1500 miles away from me. We can't get together all the time for lunch, or go see a movie on the weekends. The best part about it is that I know that she is there for me whenever I need her. We have vastly different lifestyles (me: Husband, 3 kids and I stay at home. her: Husband, 2 dogs and a carrer). These differences seem to work for us somehow though. I am sure that we will be friends for the rest of our lives.

I have another close friend, Nikki, though we have never met. I met her online about 3 years ago. In the past year we have been really close. We talk everyday, chat about everything under the sun and help each other however we can. I hope that one day we will be able to meet. She is an awesome person.

In my mind, I feel like I am rich in the friendship department, but for some reason I feel like I am lacking in it as well. Over the past few weeks I have thought about it alot and i've come to the conclusion that I don't have a friend close to me (meaning where I live). I have loads of "friends" through church, other moms that get together quite frequently in playgroups and such. There is one mom in the group that I am closer with then the rest. We play with our kids often and chat often and I love her to death, so maybe I do have a close friend here, but why do I feel like I have someone missing from my life?

I guess I want that type of friend that calls me everyday just to tell me what it looks like outside and how hot it is. Someone who will call me up and invite me to the mall. Someone who wants to share with me her thoughts, dreams, secrets, ect. Maybe that type of person doesn't exist anymore. Maybe those types of friends cease to exsist when you graduate high school or college. Maybe when you get married, those are the types of things that you should be sharing with your spouse. I don't know.

Reading back through this post I almost seem ungrateful. Honestly, it looks like I have alot. Believe me, for what I have, I am really really greatful. really. Maybe I need to be the type of friend that I am looking for to someone else. Maybe someone else out there is looking for the same thing I am looking for. Maybe it's someone close. Who knows.

I am rambling big time. I'll just post this now and go back to my thoughts.